THE REAL FOUNDATION IN MARRIAGE IS FAITH

              Marriage today has become a contentious word because in a lot of western nations it doesn’t have the same value as it used to be and most people prefer to live with their loved one instead of getting married. Also in the US, gay marriage has become a hot topic with the gay community thinking that their fundamental right to be married is being held against them. First and foremost I believe that marriage is between a man and a woman and anything else is human desire to have what they want. If gay marriage is approved in this country the polygamist will also ask for their rights to be married and who knows we have a lot of real animal lovers in this country with some going to the extreme so don’t ever be surprised if someone wanted to marry their dog. You have people doing more for their animals than for people nowadays.

              I’m married and have endured my difficulties in my marriage but I’ve learned that marriage is something special that two people have to commit and be willing to fight for because once someone gives up or find themselves lost in the marriage, the marriage is dead. We live in a society where people are fanatics of a lot of things, sports, TV shows, music, gambling, stock markets, news, etc. They get disappointed, but They don’t give up on their love or obsession. Despite the stock market tanking and people loosing money you have people that are back investing in the stock market but investing smarter and more prudent. You have sports fans that get upset when their teams don’t deliver at the playoffs time, but when the draft comes they have faith in their team for a new season.

              I believe that when people have problems in their marriage they just don’t want to put the time and effort to fight for their marriage and that’s where the problem lies. Marriage requires an attitude of completion, rather than competition. The biggest problem is couples are willing to just give up without fighting because they don’t think it’s worth the time without looking to see just how they put up with crap at their job and try to accommodate the work environment but won’t do the same thing for their marriage. I think a marriage, despite the complexity of the subject, that is based on love, mutual respect, good communication,  a purpose, acceptance and meaning in a relationship is a marriage that will succeed. I want to make sure people understand that if someone is in a marriage where there’s abuse whether it’s physical or sexual should not stay in that relationship. Also when you deal with addiction I understand the will of not wanting to stay.

              People are amazed how Christians also have a high divorce rate with non believers but the reality is most Christians are married for the wrong reasons and don’t apply their Faith in their marriage. They struggle as everyone else by putting selfishness, anger, adultery, hatred, materialism in front of their spouses instead of putting God’s will in marriage as their driven purpose. Marriage in the bible is known as a covenant between a man who shall leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they shall become one flesh (Gen.2:24). Marriage is a symbiotic relationship (mutually beneficial relationship of life); not just a relationship of authoritarian position.

              The true foundation of a marriage is finding that one person who truly loves you, understands you, have the same religious beliefs as you because at the end of the day your spouse is your teammate in life for better or worse. We’ve come to the point where most people don’t want to deal with the worse part and don’t want to fight for their marriage but will support their football team during a losing season with all the misery that it’s bring but won’t do the same thing for their marriage. We have to come back and understand that the future of our children also depends on the strength of a strong family. In the black community the lack of complete families has decimated our families and a lot of it comes back to what I said marriage is the start and foundation of a community.